Bag of Bones? Must be a weird necromancy item or maybe it’s a nature-based or time-based item. Wait, that said Bag of Beans? Huh, well, Bag of Bones would be cool, too! I’ve always been a fan of the weird, random magic items that are just incredibly bizarre, and the misread namesake for Bag of Bones is certainly in that category. That definitely means that Bag of Bones should follow that same theme.
Bag of Bones
Wondrous item, rare
This heavy silk bag contains 2d6 sun-bleached bones. The bag weighs 1/4 pound plus 1/2 pound for each bone contained in the bag. These bones are a variety of shapes, sizes, and densities.
If you dump the bag’s contents on the ground, the bones move themselves to immediately form a 10-foot radius circle. Creatures within this circle are granted Protection from Good and Evil while inside of the circle, and rest as if they are in the presence of a 9th level Bard playing song of rest. This circle turns to dust after one hour, rendering the bones useless.
If you remove a bone from the bag, and bury it at a crossroad with a moon shining upon it, the bone produces an effect 1 minute later from the ground where it was buried. The DM can choose an effect from the below list, determine it randomly via a d100, or create an effect.
01: An erinyes (see the Monster Manual for statistics) appears to make a bargain with the one who buried the bone.
02-10: A gnarled tree erupts from the ground, bearing 1d12 pristine, ripe apples. These apples remain pristine until the next full moon, at which time they turn to a foul, black sludge that bears no properties. Each pristine apple casts the Astral Projection spell upon the imbiber, and only the imbiber, when consumed.
11-20: A ghost (see the Monster Manual for statistics) appears, seeking vengeance for its death.
21-30: A skeletal servant appears to attend to your needs. The skeletal servant is finely dressed and is capable of carrying out complex commands, as long as they pertain to domestic pursuits. The servant returns to the ground after 24 hours.
31-40: The bone is ejected violently from the ground. The nearest creature must make a DC 15 Dexterity saving through, taking 5d4 bludgeoning damage on a failed save, or half as much damage on a successful one. The bone is now engraved with the true name of a demon.
41-50: 1d6+6 shadows (see the Monster Manual for statistics) rise from the ground and attack.
51-60: A crawling craw (see the Monster Manual for statistics) scratches its way out of the ground, and proceeds to lead the creature who buried it to a cache of treasure that was hidden by the claw’s wizard creator.
61-70: A femur is expelled from the ground. This femur acts as a mace of disruption (see the Dungeon Master’s Guide for statistics) for 24 hours, after which the femur crumbles to dust.
71-80: An Ioun Stone of the DM’s choice slowly rises out of the ground where the bone was buried. This Ioun Stone (see the Dungeon Master’s Guide for statistics) was once the possession of another being, who desires this stone to be returned, and knows its location at all times.
81-90: A skeletal dragon erupts from the ground, allowing the one who buried it up to eight others who are present to climb on its back and pick a destination, on the current plane or any other plane, and be transported there via flight. Upon arriving, the skeletal dragon turns to dust.
91-99: A crypt with a 60-foot square base bursts upwards. Inside is a coffin containing a vampire (see the Monster Manual for statistics). The crypt is treated as the vampire’s lair, and its coffin contains treasure of the DM’s choice.
100: A portal appears, sucking all within 100 feet through it. This portal leads to Malbolge, the sixth layer of the Nine Hells. All creatures sucked through the portal find themselves carrying a badge depicting a copper scourge, the personal symbol of Archduchess Glasya, Lord of Malbolge.